As life seems to be going so smoothly BOOM you’re standing with in a storm. And a raging one at that, you can’t seem to understand why but you just know there is a reason. As my life was becoming my own again, no longer having to work 2 jobs, having more time on my hands which should of been a blessing became more than I could handle. As I stated before time standing still meant I needed to face ME again and all the feelings I have been running from. With that became numbing myself again to avoid myself at all costs. How can this be? Everything I have been praying for a new job, more time for myself and family is suppose to be a blessing not a burden. I noticed more and more I was numbing the pain and the loneliness UNTIL my world came crashing in on me literally. The apartment I was at with all the rain we were having began to take in water, in March it was a little and my landlord was going to fix it. Come May with the storms rolling thru IL water started to pour in every where, even thru the light fixtures. In a matter of days I had mold growing, my bedroom and all its furniture ruined and my living room ceiling was starting to bubble continuously popping water everywhere. I HAD to get out and in a short time. I was able to find a cute place by my new job and as I tell you God works in mysterious ways HE TRULY DOES. My new place has a patio in which I go out and self reflect every day. Or with the trails I have now by me I walk or ride my bike to deal with my inner thoughts and find my inner peace of mind. Its hard to numb myself when I have so much beauty around to be thankful for. I am not saying by any means that I have faced ME completely but I do believe God heard my cries for help and relocated me to a place where my healing can begin again. Standing in the horrible storm for over 30 days I couldn’t see the light at the end of the tunnel BUT ITS THERE.
SO…I ask you, are you in the middle of a storm? If so hold on there is purpose you may not understand it now, but you will.
Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future”